Friday, October 11, 2013

The Crucible Project: Show Me or Show Up

In another recent blog, Seth Godin talks about The Show Me State. Neither he nor I mean Missouri; I
The Crucible Weekend: Show Me or Show Up
Missouri is the "Show Me" state, but
that's beside the point.
consider this frame of mind the bane of men's work: apathy. I've invited men to the weekend, and several times I've heard variations of "show me what it is or what I'll get before I commit to going". This, as Godin aptly notes, is preface to "now that I know what it is about, I don't need to commit".

So much of life is really a mystery, yet we're told we're better off driving out mystery, sanitizing things, extracting the essence of experiences and putting them in hermetically sealed bullet points. I fall prey to this approach.

Last weekend my wife & I went out to celebrate our anniversary. She really wanted to see Gravity, and I was fortunate enough to hear little of it before we went. I saw only the title of one review, which basically said in its title to ignore the review & go see the movie--which I did. I loved the movie; it was even better that I knew so little about the plot and nothing of how it ended. I was better off *not* knowing the details, so I could have the experience of being present during the movie.

I think this quest to stamp out the unknown, mystery, & surprise is based on fear. What if I *don't* know how this will go? What if I am the only one who doesn't know the answer? Men's work is inherently both: we don't know how it will go, and we often don't know the answer. After all, if I knew why, I'd start to heal & make new choices. Men's work, especially my own, scares the crap right out of me. I don't know how it'll turn out, how well I'll "do" my job, what I'll "get", how I'll feel, or what to do next. And leaving this long list of crazy-making questions somewhere else is often the best thing for me.

I know I can trust the men there: they've proven to me they're trustworthy, despite their imperfections. The men there are doing their best, and will make mistakes & fail sometimes, and do their best again to make things right. Perfection isn't required. Prayer, reliance upon God, empathy, skill, dedication, and honesty are overstocked on the weekend. These things are more than enough, and show up every weekend.

It's a good thing that God didn't display apathy at our sinful condition, or that Jesus didn't decide that he didn't need to commit. By comparison, it seems a small matter for men to set apathy aside for a weekend and commit to being present in their own lives. Doing those things has made a profound difference in my life, changing the trajectory of my life to be more in line with God's will. I'd love to see where it will go; part of the joy is being present while it unfolds.

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